The Theology of Suffering: Faith, Chronic Illness, and Healing for Black Women

Black woman in reflection, representing faith and healing through chronic illness and medical trauma

“God won’t give you more than you can handle.”

If you’re a Black woman living with chronic illness, you’ve probably heard some version of this more times than you can count. From the church pew to the family group chat, the message is the same: your suffering has a divine purpose, and the faithful response is to endure it quietly, pray, and trust.

But what happens when endurance becomes the very thing that keeps you from healing?

As a woman of faith with endometriosis myself, I’ve sat with too many Black women who feel trapped between their bodies and their beliefs. They love God. They trust God. And yet they’re exhausted, dismissed by doctors, overwhelmed by pain, and silently wondering: If God loves me, why am I still suffering?

This blog was written to remind you that there is room for your pain, feelings, and faith to coexist. We’re going to explore the theology of suffering to open up an honest conversation about what it means to hold faith and chronic pain in the same hands.

What Is the Theology of Suffering?

The theology of suffering is a branch of theological thought that wrestles with the meaning of human pain in the context of a loving, sovereign God. It asks the difficult questions: Why does God allow suffering? What is the purpose of pain? How do we reconcile a good God with lived experiences of illness, loss, and injustice?

Throughout church history, theologians and communities have offered different frameworks. Some emphasize suffering as redemptive, meaning it refines us by inviting us to share in Christ’s suffering. Others focus on suffering as a consequence of a broken world tainted by sin. Still others acknowledge the mystery that suffering sometimes defies neat theological explanations, and that sitting with God in the tension is itself an act of faith.

For Black women with chronic illness and medical trauma, these theological frameworks can feel invalidating and confusing. If God is inviting me to get to know Him better by suffering, how can I desire to get to know someone who I feel has inflicted pain on me? The most important thing that Christians forget here is that suffering also distorts our faith and view of God. In order to mitigate this, we must reframe suffering as not just an invitation to get to know God but also an invitation to lament and be honest with God too.

 

The “Strong Black Woman” and the Suffering Servant: When Theology Becomes a Trap

In many Black church traditions, there’s a deep reverence for endurance. The mothers of the church who “made a way out of no way.” The testimonies of surviving against all odds. This legacy is real, sacred, and worthy of honor.

But it can also create an unspoken rule: suffering is what strong, faithful Black women do. And when that narrative merges with the theology of the “suffering servant,” it can become a spiritual trap where asking for help feels like a lack of faith. Many women can relate to feeling dismissed when admitting they have reached their limit.

If you’ve ever been told to “pray harder” instead of being encouraged to see a therapist, or if you’ve minimized your own symptoms because you didn’t want to seem like you weren’t trusting God, then you’ve been ensnared by this trap. It’s not a failure of your faith. It’s a failure of a framework that was never designed to hold the full complexity of your experience as a Black woman who is struggling to be strong.

Paul invites us to “boast” in our weaknesses because when we are weak, He is strong (2 Corinthians 12:9–10). But somewhere along the way, centuries and generations later, Black women avoid weakness and vulnerability as if it were a demerit.

Medical Trauma and the Black Woman’s Body: A Crisis of Trust

For many Black women, chronic illness doesn’t exist in a vacuum. It exists within a healthcare system with a documented history of dismissing Black women’s pain, underdiagnosing conditions like endometriosis and adenomyosis, and deprioritizing the medical concerns of women of color. Studies consistently show that Black women wait longer for diagnoses, receive less adequate pain management, and are more likely to have their symptoms attributed to psychological rather than physical causes.

Medical trauma—the psychological injury that results from harmful, dismissive, or dehumanizing healthcare experiences—is not a rare occurrence for Black women. And when you layer medical trauma on top of chronic physical pain, the result is a deep wound: you hurt in your body, you hurt from the system that was supposed to help you, and you may hurt in your spirit if your faith community doesn’t know how to hold that reality.

This is where the theology of suffering must evolve. When one part of the body is weak, we should support it. If chronically ill women constantly feel invalidated and dismissed in their pain, it’s nearly impossible to feel cared for and seen. In the passages below, I aim to redefine the theology of suffering to help change this all-too-familiar pattern.

  

A Different Theology: Suffering as an Invitation to Lament and Connect

What if there’s a theology of suffering that doesn’t encourage you to be strong and silent? One that honors your pain without romanticizing it? One that sees your tears as prayers and your boundaries as acts of worship?

Scripture is full of voices that cried out in suffering and were not rebuked for it. David wrote psalms from the pit. Hagar wept in the wilderness, and God met her there; and Hagar came to know Him as the God who sees her. Job questioned God directly and was never condemned for his honesty. Jesus Himself, in the Garden of Gethsemane, asked the Father to take the cup of suffering from Him. He sweat drops of blood. He did not keep His fears and desires from God even in the face of His impending death on the cross.

If Jesus the Suffering Servant Himself expressed anguish, asked for relief, and invited His closest friends to sit with Him in His darkest hour, then perhaps the most theologically faithful thing a Black woman with chronic illness can do is not endure in silence, but speak, lament, ask for help, and refuse to be invisible in her own pain.

How Faith-Integrated Therapy Supports Healing from Medical Trauma and Chronic Illness

Healing from medical trauma and chronic illness as a Christian Black woman often means holding two realities at once: deep pain and real faith. Faith-integrated therapy (sometimes called Christian counseling or faith-based counseling) creates space for both so your spiritual life and mental health are treated as interconnected, not competing.

In my work with Black women navigating chronic illness and medical trauma, faith-integrated therapy may include:

• Exploring theology and meaning-making: noticing which beliefs about suffering are supporting your healing and which ones may be increasing shame, self-neglect, or spiritual pressure.

• Processing medical trauma with evidence-based approaches: including EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) and other trauma-informed methods such as Prolonged Exposure and Cognitive Processing Therapy.

• Rebuilding trust: in your body, in healthcare (at your pace), and in your relationship with God after experiences of dismissal, misdiagnosis, or betrayal.

• Developing a personal theology of suffering: one that is honest, compassionate, and life-giving rather than self-sacrificing or rooted in “just endure it.”

• Making room for lament, grief, and anger: addressing loss, resentment, fear, fatigue, and spiritual burnout that can come with chronic illness.

How EMDR Can Help with Medical Trauma

EMDR is a well-researched trauma therapy that can be helpful for distress connected to medical experiences. It supports the brain in reprocessing painful memories, like being dismissed by a doctor, enduring frightening procedures, or receiving a life-altering diagnosis, so those memories feel less emotionally charged and less likely to hijack the present.

For Black women with endometriosis and other chronic conditions, EMDR can be especially meaningful when provided by a therapist who understands the intersection of race, faith, chronic pain, and medical systems.

Faith and EMDR: What “Interweaves” Can Look Like

Some EMDR clinicians also use interweaves: brief, therapist-initiated prompts (questions or statements) offered during reprocessing when a client feels “stuck,” starts looping, or becomes overwhelmed. This can be common for women living with chronic illness, chronic pain, and medical trauma, because triggers may be ongoing (symptoms, appointments, flare-ups, and interactions with the healthcare system).

When faith is important to you, an interweave may gently incorporate spiritual resources to support processing rather than bypass it. For example, an EMDR-trained clinician might say: “As you notice what’s coming up, bring to mind a scripture that feels grounding to you right now. Take a moment to let its meaning settle in your body and notice what shifts as you continue.”

You Deserve More Than “Just Pray About It”

Let me be clear: prayer is powerful and it does change things. And God is present in suffering and concerned about everything that concerns us. But when your faith is weak, it is ok to seek out support.

You deserve a therapist who will sit with you in the complexity. You deserve care that doesn’t minimize your pain or spiritualize away your trauma. You deserve a space where you can say, “I love God and I’m struggling,” without anyone questioning your faith.

Finding Community in Healing: You Are Not Alone

One of the most harmful effects of chronic illness is isolation. When your body limits what you can do, when people don’t understand your condition, or when you’re tired of explaining yourself—it’s easy to withdraw. For Black women in faith communities, this isolation can be compounded by the pressure to show up, serve, and keep going no matter what.

Community matters in healing. Whether it’s a small group at church that practices radical honesty, or a therapeutic group designed specifically for women navigating chronic illness and medical trauma—connection is part of recovery. Being seen, believed, and supported by other women who understand your experience is not a luxury. It’s a necessity.

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Take the Next Step Toward Healing with Cheerful Heart

At Cheerful Heart Mental Health Counseling, we specialize in helping high-achieving women (professionals, caregivers, and ministry leaders) navigate the mental health impact of chronic illness, medical trauma, and the complex relationship between faith and suffering. Our approach is culturally affirming, evidence-based, and person-centered.

If you’re a Black woman living with endometriosis, adenomyosis, or another chronic illness and you’re ready for a therapeutic space that truly sees you, your faith, your pain, your resilience, and your right to heal, we’re here and ready to hold your pain.

Book your free consultation today at cheerfulheartmhcpllc.com

Licensed in NY, CA, NJ, PA & SC • Virtual sessions available

You don’t have to suffer in silence. Your healing matters to God and we can bear witness and support you through this season.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the theology of suffering and why does it matter for chronic illness?

The theology of suffering is a framework for understanding the meaning of pain in relation to God, his character, and his sovereignty. For Black women with chronic illness, it matters because theological beliefs can shape whether you feel permission to seek help, lament, grieve, rest, or advocate for your medical needs.

How does medical trauma affect Black women with endometriosis?

Medical trauma from dismissive healthcare experiences compounds the physical pain of chronic illnesses like endometriosis. Black women are disproportionately affected by diagnostic delays, inadequate pain management, and racial bias in medicine. This makes the nervous system overact and stay in a heightened state for prolonged periods of time. This effect also creates a layered wound that benefits from trauma-informed, culturally affirming therapy.

What is EMDR therapy and can it help with medical trauma?

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is an evidence-based therapy that helps the brain reprocess traumatic memories. It may be effective for medical trauma because it helps reduce the emotional intensity of distressing healthcare experiences that make the nervous system overactive and sensitive.

Can I include my faith in therapy?

Absolutely. Faith-based therapy honors your spiritual life as part of your healing journey. At Cheerful Heart, we create space for you to explore how your faith intersects with your mental health without judgment, pressure, or the expectation that faith alone should be enough.

Do I need to be Christian to work with Cheerful Heart?

No. While we offer faith-based therapy for those who want it, we welcome clients of all faith backgrounds and those who do not identify with any faith tradition. Your values and worldview are always respected in our therapeutic space.